


The Joy of a Big Deck

by islasands



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician)
Genre: Aussie/Kiwi, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-13
Updated: 2011-10-13
Packaged: 2017-10-24 14:04:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/264287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/islasands/pseuds/islasands
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Here's an Aussie/Kiwi take on Adam in love with Byron Cooke. The main thing you need to know is that in the land of BBQs, piss-ups, and shagging, a man's deck counts for a lot. The bigger the better. And make sure it's hard wood. Something like Jarrah.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Joy of a Big Deck

**Author's Note:**

> You might also wanna know that in Aussie speak "dick" is pronounced "deck".....

Adam wandered out onto the verandah and stuck his hand down his jocks. The sun was on grill, the pool was close to simmering, Byron was whipping up a feed in their totes mod-conned kitchen, and all up she was a cracker of a day. “God, that’s a deck and a half,” he thought, looking left and right. “None of that composite bullshit either. She’s solid as.”

He looked down at the bath they’d used for keeping the beers cool at last night’s barbie. It was overflowing with empties. “Jeeze, darl,” he called out, “we sunk some piss last night! ”

Byron came up behind him and put his hands down Adam’s jocks as well.  

“How’d ya like your eggs, darl?”

“You know what?’ Adam looked at his feet. He curled his toes. “This deck makes me feel so damn horny! I reckon I could do with some pre-brunch munch. You up for that?”

He turned around and they both looked down at Byron’s BBQ apron which had “You want a fucking sausage?” written on it. There was some movement down there. Byron grinned. “Yeah, let’s take that ferret for a run, darl!”

After the deed was done, and Adam had finished carefully and lovingly licking his lips, he suddenly slammed the arm of the armchair with his hand! “Dig a flaming hole and bury me babe, nothing beats a blowy on a Big Softie!” Byron stroked the armchair’s faux leather upholstery in complacent agreement. “Best fucking buy we ever made, darl. Now do you wanna shine your torch up my back passage right away, or you want some fucking eggs first?”

“Tough choice, darl,” Adam said. “Tough choice. Tell you what, I’ll have a Brad Pitt and think about it.”

He came out of the toilet a good half hour later and found Byron bending over, bare butt up, checking something in the oven.

"Now that’s a sight for sore eyes,” he said, making his mind up on the spot.

After a royally satisfying humperoo they polished off their steak and eggs and then Adam went outside to finish laying some blocks on their new courtyard wall. He mixed the mud and was slapping it on the top course when he sensed he was being watched. He worked harder and faster. He could never get over wanting to impress Byron. His efforts paid off.

“Crikey dick, darl, you’re so fucking strong.” Byron bent down and with feigned difficulty picked up a block. “They weigh a fucking ton! I dunno how ya do it.”

Adam threw him a swaggering grin. “Piece of piss, babe. I can carry three of those fuckers at a time. One in each hand and one on my cock!”

“No wonder it’s the size it is, darl.”

Adam was so pleased he threw down his trowel.

“Dammit, darl. How can a man work when you’re around!”

Later, when Byron had fallen asleep, Adam went down to the pool to cool off. He floated on his back and squinted at the clouds. God, he was happy. Happy as a dog with two dicks. He looked down at the one he did possess, that was floating along peacefully like a parboiled sausage. He swooshed the water to make it bob around a bit.

“We got it made,” he said. He hauled himself out of the water and sat down to sun himself for a while. He smoothed the wood with his hands. He remembered the look on Byron’s face when he came home from visiting his olds in Queensland and saw it for the first time.

“That, darl, is the biggest fucking deck I’ve ever seen!”

He had to turn away and wipe the corner of his eye. Trust darl to say that. It was the nicest fucking thing anyone had ever said to him!


End file.
